Paxilon's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[AIM . Requiem for an Astronaut (Ft. Marie Ork)]

Oh holy hell, this is incredible! I'm honored my friend!

LexRodent responds:

So glad you like it !

[AIM - Stomach of The Beast]

Oh holy hell, this is incredible, I'm so glad I was able to inspire something this cool! 11/10 for understanding the assignment, nightmare imagery and disgust are my favorite topics to explore when doing horror art!

[Ritual]

I know nOThing about music but this shit rocks hell yea

[I've got a light for ya.]

YOU FUCKIN-

Gianni responds:

Hah! You can't convince me not to if I've already done it! SUUCKKKERRRR! HAPPY BEEPBOOP!

[Hyperion]

HOW CAN THIS POSSIBLY BE SO TITS
I CANT--
HOW--
WAAAAAAAGGGH

Hellwreckage responds:

Did you break something there? You broke something there. Sheet. She broke some-thang.

-EDIT- Tits. -END OF EDIT-

[Tombstone Newscast (3)]

SIRUNDEAD NEWS: YOUR GO-TO SOURCE FOR CURRENT EVENTS, AS THEY HAPPEN.
INTEGRITY.
HILARITY.
EVERY NIGHT AT ELEVEN.
SIRUNDEAD NEWS.

Gianni responds:

The news could possibly matter, if all things discussed and not discussed were not destined to perish with the amusing reaping time performs on all things, dead and alive. As this world's moot candle flickers out with the detached breath of reality, you will find that this breaking news broke nothing, for there is only nothing, and you will find that what you thought was new was over before it even thought to begin.

Life's a casino, and the house always wins.

[Max Pixel]

Prologue Part II: A Binary Choice.
Gyhuhuhu--
Gyehehehgphfsnort do u get it

Gianni responds:

The one thing I hate about the Newgrounds review system is you can't edit or delete anything. It's just permanently carved into history. I hate that.

Until right now. Right now I love it.

Like a bottle of scotch on sale, I get it.

[One Thousand Pens]

PURE, HIGH-OCTAINE FUN! AHAHAA, GOD, YOU ALWAYS KNOW HOW TO CRACK ME UP YOU RASCawait, what was that last part about blowing up Cana-

Gianni responds:

I aim to displease and I always hit my mark.

[Stare of the Moth]

STARE OF THE MOTH (2014)

The harrowing tale of a time-travellers decent into madness.

Directed and starring SirUndead. Written by Sirundead and RadioactiveMoth.
9.5/10

Synopsis: A catastrophic time-machine failure traps the unnamed protagonist (SirUndead) in the space between spaces. Left with only a backwoods twitter account to communicate with our timestream, his profound lonliness drains his sanity over what could be three millenia or three milliseconds.

Reviews:
User Vagilon Writes:
Excellent flick, five stars. Impressive phallic imagery aside this movie really hits home to the Twitter community. SirUndead is a fine actor and does an amazing job of portraying the desperate, attention-starved internet denizen most Twitter accounts play host for-- it also plays off of the average Twitterers most basic fear, of being completely unacknowlaged despite a steady internet connection and constant ball-licking retweets and comments on other users' material. Absolutely recommended.

User Paxilon writes:
0 outta a billion stars
sirundead was the best porn actor of our time and now hes trying 2 do srs work, wtf. get back to eating dicks ur good at it stop trying to b anything other then a slut

Gianni responds:

Please look forward to the acceptable sequel in ten years, and the disappointing conclusion of the trilogy in eleven years.

Then the generic frown-inducing gritty reboot in thirty years.

[Berry]

Thank-you for taking the time to review our product.
Here at Lisa Frank Industries, we strive for excellence in all our wide range of toiletries and personal lubricants. Our Lisa Frank Berry-Scented Body Wash is made with only 100% fresh-squeezed unicorn cum, or UniCum (patent pending), to ensure our customers are always fully satisfied.
Unfortunately we are unable to issue you a refund, as your review has not described the intended use of Lisa Frank Berry-Scented Body Wash. The bottle was designed as a convinient applicator to be inserted smoothly into the anus and then squeezed to deliver UniCum directly into the colon.
We have included a free sample-size bottle of Lisa Frank Berry-Scented Body Wash for your enjoyment, as well as detailed instructions on how to apply. We hope you will write another review after you have tried our product again.

Yours,
Lisa Frank.

Gianni responds:

Dear Lisa Frank,

[page is shredded, bloodied, and whatever aggressively carved scribblings were once hatefully etched into the paper are now completely illegible with the scars of malice]

[a hollow point with a bow around it is inside of the envelope]